Taphophilia, Memento Mori and More

Musings on cemetery wanders, and how spending time with the dead can be useful for the living.

Skull and crossbones on a huge slab in the Highlands

Do you get a sense of intrigue and macabre delight when you pass by a cemetery? Do you lose track of time as you walk for hours amongst gravestones? Do you study their inscriptions? Do you feel a strange sense of calm and peace when surrounded by memorials to the dead? You my friend, are a taphophile. Or “tombstone tourist” if you prefer…

Welcome to the club!

I’ve always been drawn to cemeteries, and and I have oodles upon oodles of gravestone photos. I get a soothing, calming feeling amidst stones that whisper of times past, beckoning me to learn their secrets.

Even if you don’t linger in graveyards for longer than many would deem “normal,” you’re no doubt familiar with the iconography of the dead. You know…skulls, hourglasses and the like. These are called Memento Mori, which is a Latin term for “remember that you must die.” (Or something along those lines.)

These symbols of mortality include skulls, crossbones, coffins, hourglasses, spades, winged figures etc and are found in abundance in cemeteries. Many folks like to spin stories of pirates, plagues or Knights Templar but the simple reality is that the vast majority of these symbols simply serve as reminders of our own mortality - that all of us are mortal, that this life and all its treasures are fleeting.

This topic is often discussed in depressed tones, but might I suggest a change in the narrative. I enjoy cemetery wanders, and think they deserve a prominent place in the lives of the living.

The act of walking itself is a huge benefit, and cemeteries are usually places of peace and quiet. If walking isn’t your thing, you can sit on a bench and think, or just rest. You can admire the architecture. You can watch birds and other critters, going about their day among the trees and flowers and grass.

(Side note to Doctor Who fans…I understand there was a certain dark episode about blinking around angels, but I was very cautious photographing this lovely lady along the Antonine Wall in Bearsden…)

In many cemeteries you can take your dog for a walk - this one can be a bit controversial but I do know that if I were to be buried in a cemetery, nothing would delight me more than to know that dogs and their people were enjoying a nice walk around my final resting place. (If they are respectful of others and clean up after themselves of course…)

Cemetery in Coupar Angus.

You can also (and I would argue should) take your children for cemetery walks. Death is often such a hush hush topic but there are so many cultures where it isn’t, and I think they’re emotionally and mentally healthier for it.

As I explore cemeteries I am often moved by beautiful words dedicated to loved ones past, including 4 legged friends like the time I wandered into a pet cemetery while scouting a Pictish stone. Bless their little furry souls.

But its not all about those who are gone - you can also feel inspired to tell your loved ones how you feel while they’re still with you.

Marcus Aurelius, (a man I love to quote!) said “You could leave life right now. Let that determine what you do and say and think.”

Or to quote Andy Dufresne from one of my all time favorite movies (Shawshank Redemption), “I guess it comes down to a simple choice really. Get busy living or get busy dying.”

Andy & Red in Shawshank Redemption

Much like breaking my heel bone reminded me how much I want to do in life, I choose to view Memento Mori as a call to life while it’s here, not a somber reminder of death.

Thanks for reading my musings! Here are a few of my favorite photos from my taphophilic affliction.

Lilly

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